Quotes from the Reduced Shakespeare company This is basically a show where they do all (well, almost...they skipped "Coriolanus" though) of Shakespeare's plays in like two hours.  It's VERY funny.  No, let me emphasize that a little more...it's VERY VERY VERY VERY (x10) hilarious.  I saw it in London and was lucky enough to have it put on at my school by some really talented people (almost as good as the original!), so I saw it here three times, notebook in hand each time to make sure I missed NOTHING.  I recommend this if you're going to be in the London area...better yet, why not just book tickets on three different nights in advance?  You'll want to go that many times, trust me.  And if you don't, can I have the other tickets?   "I'm supposed to call you Butt Love?"--no no, that's "but love"...easy enough mistake, though.  "Ach, ya diiiiiiiid."--also from the RSC show...they really researched those Scottish accents well, didn't they?  "Cut the crap, Hamlet.  My biological clock is ticking and I want babies now!"--what Part C of the Superego was supposed to say (I was never in that part ;_;)  "Please welcome me in joining Christian Malcolm!"--Spoonerism anyone?  No, it's a Bush-ism.  "You mean it's illegal to take someone's bag?  But we do it all the time in our country!"--from the London show, obviously, they couldn't use that in the shows in America  "By yonder blessed virgin I swear...nah, I don't think so, Romeo."--one time when they said that line they were pointing to me...fwahaha.  "We already did that one, remember?  I threw up on the virgin."--RSC (that show just had too many funny lines; next time I see it I'm just gonna bring a notebook and write everything down)  "A nose by any other name would still smell!"--from Romeo and Juliet  "Oob!"--from the backwards Hamlet (they did that line so much better in London, as with the Butt Love line)  "Let's see...'dead, for a ducat, dead' means...'Shit, I killed the wrong dude.'"--one of the guys looking up a line in Cliff's Notes  "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are ever dreamed of in your philosophy.  So piss off!"--hey, that wasn't in the script...  "Oh shit, I am slain!"--well, what would you say if you had just been poisoned from the tip of a sword?  "Ach, ye haggis face."--from the Scottish accent Macbeth (hee hee)  "I was from me mum's womb untimely ripped!  Now what do ye think of that?"  "That's bloody disgusting!"--the Scottish Macbeth  "Somehow you have the idea that all of Shakespeare's heroines wear bad wigs and vomit excessively when they die."--yeah, that about sums it up  "Men are all dissemblers: they disassemble things and then they assemble them again.  Oh, I don't know what dissembler means!"--I think this was Juliet's nurse or something like that  "Yo, this is a story 'bout a Moor named Othello.  He likes white women...and he likes...green jello!"--from the Othello rap (one of my favorite parts)  "It is I, Hamlet, the Great Dane!"--he also called himself "Hamlet the danish"  "...Before it becomes a couch for incest!"  "Incest!"  "A couch!"--the ghost, Hamlet, and Horatio  "Fictional character on the field!  Lear is disqualified, and he's not happy about it!"--from the histories football game  "For never was there a tale of more woe, than that of Othello and Desdemo...no."--from the messed up Othello  "And then in a night of dance and romance, he tries to get into Juliet's pants."--except she was wearing a skirt, but it works, it works...  "Be to not or be to."--the backwards Hamlet  "Judas Priest is God."--one of the "satanic messages" in the backwards Hamlet  "Methinks the lady doth protest too much.  Get it...get it?  He doesn't get it."--the king in Hamlet  "In 1939 Shakespeare invaded Poland, thus precipitating World War II."--the guy getting Shakespeare's biography mixed up with Hitler's     back